Captain Chris

Captain Chris

I’m a captain, paddleboard coach, tour guide, and blogger who enjoys the outdoors, especially anything on and in the water. I’ve been living aboard the Grouchy Turtle full-time since shortly after buying her, and I even did my first winter aboard up in New Jersey, where I froze my butt off on the Hudson. After that I decided it was finally time to escape New Jersey for warmer southern climates.

Now I’m living the dream in the Florida Keys, and making all of my friends, relatives, and old cubicle buddies jealous. My real dream is to be out cruising…or just spending extended periods as an expat in various locations throughout paradise, while cruising part time. But for now, the Florida Keys will do!

Captain Chris Gruno
USCG 50 Ton Master Inland/OUPV
PaddleFit Core Certified Coach

Boat Dog Sparky


I’m a professional beggar, player, cuddler, and lap dog. I love being out on the water, paddleboarding, kayaking, playing with dolphins, and just jumping off of of the SUP to go swimming.

I escaped from my former land lubber family, and was found wandering the streets of downtown West Palm. After that I spent some time at a local animal rescue, before moving aboard the Turtle. When we aren’t out on adventures, I enjoy running around the boat, jumping through the small window in the saloon, chasing after iguanas, and playing with my bear.

Sparky The Boat Dog
USCG 12 Pound Iguana Chaser
Paddleboard Navigator

2 Responses to About The Crew

  1. WOW! WOW! and Double WOW! Stumbled across this site and yeah, I’m envious!!! Though I am actually totally phobic about the ocean, this would be really cool on a lake too. But I have to ask about Sparky, does he stay on the boat all day when you are working? So what about when he has “to go”? How does this all work out??? I take my puggle, Manny, with me everywhere whenever I can. I finally purchased a kayak (open top)of my own this summer and want to teach him go kayaking with me. Did you have to do anything in particular with Sparky to go on the paddle board? By the way I LOVE The Buy Sparky a treat, simply BRILLIANT!!!

    • Thanks Donna!

      There is no shortage of places where you can live aboard on lakes, rivers, bays, even just tied to the dock full-time. Sparky does have to stay on the boat when I work, but I bring him just about everywhere else I go. I take him for an extra long walk in the morning, and he has one of those fake grass pads, but he refuses to use it.

      I didn’t have to do anything to train him. He loves the water and immediately jumped on the board the first time he saw. He’s fallen off a few times, but that’s just because he runs all over the place, even on the front of the board…even when it’s choppy out.

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